Let's celebrate the things we like about ourselves!

So I see so many girls posting the photo below asking other people what they like about them. I have a better idea! Why don't we post things WE like about each of these? I'll start

1. Eyes- I like the way my eyes sparkle and have little freckles in them

2. Smile- I like that my smile is so big with a cute little crooked aspect to it

3. Face- I like the youthfulness of my face, and no acne is a plus

4. Body- I like that my body can do healthy things like hiking, swimming, walking, and biking 

5. Words- I like that I can use my words to express myself, in a beautiful way

6. Personality- I like my wit  

7. Attitude- I like that I find gratitude and the upside of everything

8. Jokes- I like that I can laugh at myself 

9. Everything- I like me?

10. Something else- I like my resiliency 

Your turn 

I could be that guy

I was watching Grey's tonight (typical Thursday) and as usual, learned a lesson I needed to learn... Or at least acknowledge once again. It isn't in the what happens, it's in our reactions to what happen.

This quadriplegic found out he has an inoperable brain tumor and has to stop doing this state of the art sensory treatment, yet the treatment has given him more movement than in years past. 

Yet he has this amazing attitude! This "nothing will stop me, I've got sensory abilities back, hands that can play tetris, and you're not stopping this treatment without my consent... Unless of course you take my tumor out!" How cool is that! This guy is a quadriplegic with a brain tumor and is totally owning his destiny. He's like screw you doc, this is how it's gonna be.

So after a long day of battling my own brain, I'm saying screw it brain! I'm owning my own attitude. I have no clue what news I receive Monday or Tuesday regarding this most recent job interview, but it will not make me or break me. And it definitely won't be a brain tumor or paralysis! 

(To catch everyone up on that, I am in this unemployment purgatory where I have one "amost guaranteed" job that wouldn't start until after the holidays, and this other job I'm in the running for that would start right away... And every travel plan I had for the first couple of week of November is on hold... Just talking about it brings me anxiety, so I'm just going to stop talking now) 

Anyways, there's my mini lesson tonight

Love to all, light to all

DBear 

Reiki + Bear = The best thing since sliced bread!

Disclosure: I did not ask for permission before writing this... Sometimes in life, it is better to just do it and ask for forgiveness later. Bear, please forgive me, but I have to tell the world how awesome you are...

Many of you know I have an adopted dad named Bear. He and I have been writing hand-written letters to one another since I moved from home in 2010. This, I find healing in itself and I am sure the post office is grateful for our communications. However, our relationship has gone much deeper over the last couple of years. Bear began learning Reiki at the ripe old, but young at heart, age of 70+
and has now moved in to distance Reiki.

Reiki (to me) is an exchange of energy, a spiritual healing that takes place within this exchange. Some may liken it to the laying of hands they do in the Bible belt, but I find it to be in it's own category because it does not require any belief but a mere willingness to be open and be connected, a willingness to be still and receive. It is open to all faiths, colors, shapes, sexual orientations, etc. Yes, it helps to be connected to a higher source of strength in order to receive the Reiki. I find that when I am on a more even keel, I am better able to receive. And receipt of this Reiki puts me on such an even keel. So back to Bear, he went through extensive training and continues to do so. His energy seems to strengthen the more he does this work, and he has taken on four clients a day now. The cool thing about Bear is he does this by donation or barter system, he has yet to ask for a dime. I am his daughter, so I get top treatment... and I was his guinea bear :)

I had experienced one healing in 2009 by another Reiki practitioner, Vivian (Ladybug)... she did a session on me before I was set to have knee surgery. I went in for the surgery and the doctor said the bone they were set to remove was no longer floating around, it had miraculously fixed itself.

Fast forward to today... Anyone who knows me personally knows my struggles. From depression and anxiety, to substance abuse and an eating disorder, dealing with any huge life change is a task. However, my mental psyche has been cool and calm through this entire lay-off ordeal. Which is saying a LOT. Even through all of the injuries, I haven't freaked out and taken it out on my body by restricting... Which leads me to my knee...

Bear has been working tirelessly on my right knee. Mom's friends (mine too) have prayed about it.. I lost my insurance so I am now completely at the mercy of miracles and natural healing. Back in June, I had 3 back to back injuries on my knees. I was put on steroids. Between that and eating crap, I gained a LOT of weight, which put more stress on my knee. Up until today, even swimming hurt, unless I just swam with my arms. Sunday, my knee slipped out and I had to put it back in. Today, I woke up pain free (this never happens), and was even able to bike. I chose bike because I had been avoiding it forever and that still, small voice said to try. So I did. Today, I did a mini biathlon with no pain, no ibuprofen, just me, water, and exercise. My knee hasn't swollen, I do not have knives sticking in it, no pins, tingling, nothing. Miracles, I tell ya, miracles.

I could go on and on about this... even the mystery spot in my stomach was cured... the one doctors couldn't figure out to save their life. I'm also still a non-smoker (almost 10 months), and am willingly making healthier food choices. It will take a while to get completely back on track with my physical health, but I have the best practitioner there is. And he sends me distance Reiki every morning! Thank you, Bear, I woof thee!!!

P.S. I HIGHLY recommend you try Bear Reiki for ANY problem you may have. If you're in Tallahassee, he either comes to you or you go to him. If you're at a distance, no problem! Contact me for a way to reach him. Yes, we need to set up a website for him... I will await his approval to do so :)

Love and Light,
DBear

The single 29 year old- Pros and Cons

Sometimes people ask me if I enjoy being single. If I have any plans on being in a serious relationship anytime soon. I really don't think of it that often. Only when I'm insomniatic or really lonely... The loneliness is rare. See, I spend a lot of time alone, but I'm not lonely. It took many years for me to reach this place of comfort with my own company. It's priceless. Do I miss ex-lovers? One. But more than that, I miss my ex BFF. To me, that relationship was more than anything a lover could have given me. I'm about to get real here but here goes- sexual intimacy, I can do that myself. The emotional intimacy, that is what I crave. Someone who gets me and all my faults and loves me the same. So I can get that from my girlfriends (the platonic ones, smart butts, yeah you know who you are.) So I've come up with a list of pro-single items. It's been years since my last healthy relationship (non platonic) so bare with me here... 

Pros of singlehood

1. I can be on my time, all the time.

2. Traveling solo is much easier, in my opinion. Unless you have an awesome travel companion (rare)

3. I can pick up and move anywhere at any given time.

4. My cat loves all the attention

5. I don't have to obsess about a call or text or wondering when she's coming home (I never really did that anyway)

6. No baggage but my own.

7. More attention to genuine friends and family members because I am not sucked in to the one-tracked mind of love boat

8. My money or lack thereof is my own... Fully self-supporting, independent woman. 

9. I obsess over my weight enough. I don't want to worry about doing this for another's pleasure as well. Then again, a true love will love me no matter my size. 

10. I have too much stuff to share my closet. 

Cons of singlehood

1. Always wondering if I will find that once in a lifetime true love

2. Dating. It just sucks 

3. Online dating. It just sucks 

4. Missing someone to help with the little things... Groceries, household stuff, carrying my things when on crutches. Then again, friends have stepped up to do this (see pro list #7)

5. Wondering if I will do the baby rearing alone (yes, I have a donor dad picked out, but can I handle single motherhood)

6. I'd put cuddling here but there's only one person I ever enjoyed cuddling and she was off limits 

7. I'd put massages but see con list #6 (above)

8. Someone to share all the details of my life with... (See pro list #7)

9. I'm out of cons at the moment

Share your thoughts, I'd love to hear them. 

Cha cha real smooth...

Last night, I had someone tell me I had such a good attitude and outlook regardless of my recent "unfortunate circumstances." I'd love to pretend that's true, that I really have it all together. In reality, it just sucks to be depressed and a Debby Downer, Sullen Sally, whatever... So I may as well just make the best of each day and take it all in stride.

Then I came upon this sign, pictured below...

It reminded me of when I had to go to eating disorder treatment sober (talk about a step backward!) But while I was there, a good friend sent me a card with the lyrics of the "cha cha slide" (my favorite dance... Ever)

So, Mel, thank you for that card all those years ago... And random person, thank you for today's sign. I choose to be the optimist. And rember, it can ALWAYS be worse! (Lyrics below... Just dance!)

Love and light

Me

Now it’s time to get funky 
To the right now, to the left 
Take it back now ya’ll 
1 hop this time, 1 hop this time 
Right foot 2 stomps, left foot 2 stomps 
Slide to the left, slide to the right 
Criscross, criscross 
Cha Cha real smooth 

Let’s go to work 
To the left, take it back now ya’ll 
2 hops this time, 2 hops this time 
Right foot 2 stomps, left foot 2 stomps 
Hands on your knees, hands on your knees 
Get funky with it, aahhhhhhhhhh yaaaa 
Come on, Cha Cha now ya’ll 

Turn it down, to the left 
Take it back now ya’ll 
5 hops this time 
Right foot let’s stomp, left foot let’s stomp 
Right foot again, left foot again 
Right foot let’s stomp, left foot let’s stomp 

Freeze, Everybody Clap yo hands 
Come on ya’ll, check it out 
How low can you go? 
Can you go down low? 
All the way to da floor? 
How low can you go? 
Can you bring it to the top? 
Like it never never stop? 
Can you bring it to the top? 
1 hop, right foot now 
Left foot now ya’ll 
Cha Cha real smooth 

My 12 Relief Valves...

Every pressurized system needs a relief valve. There has to be a way to reduce the stress, the tension, before it becomes too much to bare. There has to be a way to find relief because if the pressure doesn't find a way out, it will make one. It will explode. It's the pressure we put on ourselves that's the hardest to bare. The pressure to be better then we already are. The pressure to be better than we think we can be. It never ever lets up. It just builds and builds and builds. (Meredith Grey) 

This has been my life lately. Just to catch you all up: lost job. thought I m found a new job. That one fell through. I may have found another new job, but 

there is an extensive waiting period. In the meantime, my car was burglarized and the most precious item I had was stolen (warrior necklace) Throw in a death and a couple of lost relationships, ridiculous amounts of judgment from people who have no clue, and we have ourselves one hell of a month. 

So, time for the positives... How have I not exploded? 

1. Lots of actual face time and phone time with friends and family

2. Service work

3. Physical exercise when I can

4. Reiki! every morning from Bear 

5. A new healthy lifestyle. 

6. Believe it or not, I'm still smoke free (9 months) Instead of grabbing sugar or diet  coke, I grab raw snap peas, green beans, carrots, celery, etc.

7. Laughter with a 2 year old!

8. New sponsees

9. travel! Free travel! I've seen more of California this month than I have all year!

10. Music

11. Netflix w/ China cuddles on the side

12. Knowing without a doubt that set backs are temporary

All in all, I really have been reminded of the important things in life and which friends truly have my back. That is a gift no amount of money can buy. Thank God because I'm poor in the monetary sense ;)

Love and light

Dbear