To have so many people, some I don't even know in real life, affirm that I am not alone, that I am a warrior, that is what this sharing of our stories is all about. That gives me the strength to carry on, putting one foot in front of the other, being my own advocate while allowing others to assist (thanks, Mom!), and taking the proper steps to take care of me.
Truth is, I've been obsessing over calling my doctor all week because I'm scared to deal with the next round of tests, medications, etc. I'm scared to hear that I have one more incurable chronic illness and that maybe drugs will help. Drugs with horrible side effects. Yet today, I got the strength when receiving messages and comments, and some interactions I had with an old mentor at a lunch meeting today. I was reminded that when the pain is great enough, I'll make that call, schedule that appointment, take that new medication (thanks Shelfer!)
I'm still sleeping a ridiculous amount. I'm still exhausted. I haven't exercised in I don't know how long. And I feel like a cow. But today, I got a little more strength from this community I've been able to build around me. From California to New York to Florida, and everywhere in between. I love you all. Truly. You mean the world to me.
Love and Light
Carla
You are stronger than you know. I think it may be easier for people to see it in you and your writing than it is for you. Your friend is right - when it becomes too much, you will take the next steps.
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